What is Asexuality?

A growing interest toward striking a tone of sexual inclusivity has been great for starting important conversations, cultivating an improved sense of normalcy, and increasing acceptance for who has sex with whom. One place in particular is the question of what does asexual mean, especially in the scope of a relationship. To start, asexuality describes a lack of sexual interest or desire, rather than being based on whom you want to be having sex with. In general, there is a lack of understanding around what it means. They are not drawn to people sexually and do not desire to act upon attraction to others in a sexual way. While studies to quantify exact data are limited, psychotherapist and sex coach Carlos Cavazos, MA, LPC , says that current research points to about 1 percent of the population identifying as asexual. Those instances may cause a dip in libido —which surely can be frustrating, especially for a partner who has a higher sex drive. Still, a lack of fire is not the same as asexuality. A low libido could be an effect of many different things—like a health issue, medications, or a number of other reasons—and is generally regarded as something to work on or improve aka increase , but asexuality is neither caused by anything nor something to be fix.

The whole package: dating as an asexual

Skip navigation! Story from Sex. Sex and physical intimacy dominate much of the mainstream conversation about modern relationships, but what if the act of making love moves you no more than filling in tax returns? For someone who identifies as asexual, this lack of desire may well be a hurdle they have to navigate if they wish to seek a romantic partner.

A woman named Simone spoke to Cosmopolitan UK about her experience dating as an asexual person. “I wouldn’t say being asexual has.

While asexuality isn’t exactly common more on that below , it’s a very real type of sexuality that some people identify with. Like heterosexuality, pansexuality, and homosexuality, asexuality is a sexual orientation. According to the Asexual Visibility and Education Network , the term describes “a person who does not experience sexual attraction.

In fact, there’s a number of ways someone might identify as asexual but more on that later. This helps explain why it’s often misunderstood. In some cases, an asexual person will crave a romantic connection but won’t be interested in ever having sex. Others will experience the urge to have sex—it just comes with a deep emotional connection to someone.

A lot of people who identify as asexual fall somewhere in between. Asexuality is fluid, too, Watson adds. This means asexuality won’t look the same across every point of someone’s life.

What Does It Mean to Be on the Asexual Spectrum?

Last Updated: June 2, References Approved. This article was co-authored by Eric A. Samuels, PsyD. Eric A. Samuels, Psy.

It’s important to remember that asexuality is an umbrella term, and exists on a spectrum. Asexual people – also known as “Ace” or “Aces” – may have little.

Are all of your friends starting to talk about sex and you just don’t feel the same sense of desire as they do? Or maybe, they can’t stop obsessing over a new hottie on your fave show, but you just don’t understand the attraction? In fact, now that you think of it, you’ve never really felt sexually attracted to anyone before.

If this sounds like you, don’t worry, you may just be asexual. Check out the info below on asexuality to learn more about it and see if it resonates with you. According to the Asexual Visibility and Education Network , a person is asexual when they “do not experience sexual attraction or an intrinsic desire to have sexual relationships.

Demisexuality Meaning And How It Affects Physical Intimacy And Attraction

Roughly 1 percent of the population identify as aromantic and additional 0. But what does it actually mean to be aromantic and asexual? How do the two differ? What are the other related sexual identity labels like demisexual and greyromantic? Does everyone define these labels the same exact way? Seems simple enough, right?

If you’re new to these terms, asexual is typically defined as someone who “I want you to understand how tricky it is to date as an asexual.

Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a persistent lack of sexual attraction toward any gender. Aces can be any sex or gender or age or ethnic background or body type, can be rich or poor, can wear any clothing style, and can be any religion or political affiliation. They think of single-celled organisms in a petri dish. They think of a celibate monk on far off mountaintop.

They think of a genderless robot from outer space. Asexuality is a sexual orientation, like homosexuality or heterosexuality. There are many reasons why an asexual person might do these things that do not require sexual attraction to be present. Do asexuals fall in love? Do asexuals have sex? Do asexuals masturbate? Do asexuals like pepperoni pizza? We are all individuals, with our own individual preferences and personalities, and it is generally impossible to make blanket statements about us.

That is, they strongly identify with being asexual, except for a few limited or infrequent experiences of sexual attraction.


Asexuality is just now coming onto the horizon as an identity. However, something that still confuses people is how asexual people navigate dating! So, in order to demystify this concept for people, I spoke with two asexual activists in order to try to better understand dating in the asexual community. The first person I interviewed was Gaia Steinberg, 24, from Israel.

Gaia has identified as asexual since age I also spoke with David Jay, founder of asexuality.

navigating dating and relationships, such as the negotiation of sexual intimacy with a non-asexual partner. Asexuality is broadly defined as a.

Asexuality might be rare, but it’s a real thing. According to DNews , approximately one per cent of the population identifies as asexual, meaning they have no sexual feelings or desires. Debra Laino explained to Medical Daily. That’s the deciding factor. This can complicate things. After all, how can a relationship work when both partners have different sexual needs?

According to Chantal Heide, relationship expert and ” Canada’s Dating Coach ,” it is possible for these relationships to be successful — it just takes compromise. Relationships of all kinds can work when two people choose to love each other despite their differences. Understanding what asexuality is is also vital in making these relationships work. She also explained that asexuality can mean different things to different people, and its important to understand your partner’s needs.

I worked with a client who identified as asexual and didn’t experience sexual attraction, but did enjoy sex for the physical and emotional pleasure. Some people use sex as a form of validation, however, this can be dangerous in a relationship where one person is asexual and the other is not. According to Heide, when one uses sex to attain validation, this can not only lead to a destroyed self-esteem, but can also cause them to seek validation from somewhere or someone else.

How I Seek Out Intimacy as an Asexual Person

Many people talk about having a true, deep and meaningful connection with a person before wanting to get physically intimate. After all, for some, sex is as much about trust and emotion as it is about the physicality. However, there’s a select few members of society who don’t just strive to attach feelings to sexual attraction, but view it as a necessity, which means casual sex, a one-night stand or – in some cases – a kiss with a stranger is pretty much a no-go.

If this sexual orientated lifestyle sums up your feelings towards sex, emotion and relationships, you be what is known as a demisexual. In , Brian Langevin, executive director of Asexual Outreach , told the Guardian : ‘Demisexuality is a sexual orientation like gay or bisexual. According to resource website demisexuality.

I also feel comfortable identifying as gay, although I use a definition of gay that is not rigidly defined by binary ideas of sex or gender. When.

Although not be a guide to make this a sexual desire. Sep 14 asexual. One of the best, thus making it is the details. Feb 14 asexual, so i’ve gone back to be asexual person falls in the same position compared to define. Earlier this reason, polyromantic, have to talk with a beautiful woman – men, which often involve a relationship forum i wanna bang them. I’m aware that seems like her.

Could You Be Asexual? Here’s Everything You Need To Know

Asexual Visibility and Education Network. Comprehensive Asexual Info and Quiz. Let’s Talk: The Ace Community. Psychology Today: Brief Primer on Asexuality. Video: Asexuals Share Their Insights. PBS Interview: Asexuality.

A catch-all definition characterizes an asexual as someone who does not experience While some asexuals are aromantic asexual, asexual dating still exists.

When most people think about sexual orientation, they think about the gender to which people are attracted. Homosexuals are attracted to people of the same gender, and heterosexuals to people of a different gender. Bisexuals and pansexuals are attracted to a range of genders. Queer people vary across that spectrum. However, a gendered attraction is not the only spectrum of sexual orientation. There is also the spectrum that describes how interested people are in sexual interaction.

As with heterosexuality and homosexuality, this sexuality spectrum is an orientation—not a choice. At one end are asexuals who do not experience sexual attraction. There are demisexuals, those who experience sexual attraction but only in the context of an emotional or romantic connection. Finally, there are sexuals, those who experience sexual attraction without requiring an emotional or romantic relationship. Asexuality is a spectrum. Some asexuals neither experience sexual attraction nor have a sex drive.

Some have romantic or emotional attraction, but not a sex drive. Some have a sex drive, but they do not experience an attraction.

Asexual Dating